Blogs Are Stupid

Doesn't anyone believe in Dear Diary anymore? What happened to the joy of putting actual pen to paper? And why does every ordinary Jane and John think they can write well enough to burden the world with their scribblings? It’s a mystery that badly needs solving. My first entry contains my thoughts about blogging and will set your expectations. The rest will probably be stream of consciousness garbage, much like you’ll find on any other blog. Perhaps we will both come away enlightened.

Sunday, March 19, 2006

A Nigga By Any Other Name

Daman Wayans has been denied a patent on his "Nigga" clothing line, because the U.S Patent Office will not approve brand names that are disparaging, derogtary or prejudicial. Imagine that.

Mr. Wayans has been fighting this ruling for 14 months on the grounds that the Hip-Hop Culture has redefined the term. Living in a very racially diverse area, I understand that there is certain nomenclature that can be used with impunity within a given demographic group by members of that group. However, I am hard pressed to understand why a term that historically has been used to marginalize, subjugate, oppress and terrorize an entire race would then be adopted by that race as the vernacular of brotherhood. It just doesn't make sense to me.

I am a member of one minority group by virtue of my sex and there is plenty of offensive slanguage that has been applied to us through the ages. But I don't see any of them making a resurgence as some kind of uber hip pop-culture designation, unless you count that whole fat/phat thing.

Maybe I'm just not ancillary enough to understand taking ownership of a word to overcome its negative connotations. Maybe I should try owning Fat Honky Bitch. I'll use it to refer to all my PTA and Sports Mom and Coffee Klatch friends. I'll design a logo and wear it on a big silver chain around my neck. We will create a culture of acceptance, respect and solidarity for Fat Honky Bitches everywhere, but only those who belong to our ranks will have the privilege of using the term. We will consider everyone else who uses it ignorant and bigotted, especially minority women who are skinny and well-mannered. I'll even create a line of FHB clothing, and pretty soon, everyone will want to be have FHB emblazoned upon their posterior. It will be super cool and not even a little bit stupid or offensive.

On second thought, I think Mr. Wayans might be on to something. I think this could work if I can get it past the Patent Office. Otherwise, I'll have to call my clothing line Overweight Caucasion Shrew and that just doesn't pack the same punch.

Wow...decades of stereotyping and prejudice eradicated in just moments. Who knew? And why isn't everyone doing this? Somebody prepare a press release, this is gonna be BIG.

5 Comments:

  • At 9:48 AM, Blogger Mom101 said…

    Wow, I'm so out of the pop culture loop I wasn't aware of this.

    The real problem is that it makes white folks inclined to lower their voices when speaking about a clothing label. That just feels plain stupid, doesn't it? "Hey Margie, I'm going to get these..[looks from side to side, then leans in close and lowers her voice] nigga jeans this weekend. They make my ass look great!"

     
  • At 9:56 AM, Blogger Kirdy said…

    On behalf of FHBs everywhere........

    HOLLA!

     
  • At 11:10 AM, Blogger gingajoy said…

    i'm with you here. we don't need white college boys wearin' "nigga" jeans (no matter how good it makes an ass look). however, i do heartily claim the title "bitch." i guess it's about context. there are certain people in this world who can call me their "bitch" (and they are all female) and it's a form of comradeship. there are other people who i will bitch-slap if they tried the same thing. (Bitch PhD's blog is a great example of that appropriation).

    once you begin to "brand" these terms, then the context for reapproprating and subverting a term's meaning--well, it's all suddenly about commerce.

     
  • At 9:59 PM, Anonymous Kristen said…

    Actually, I'm going for chinkwear, for the slanty-eyed bitch in all of us.

    What do you think?

     
  • At 10:10 PM, Blogger Blog Antagonist said…

    Oh no doubt about it...women will be standing in line for your designs. Get yourself an investor, stat.

     

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