Blogs Are Stupid

Doesn't anyone believe in Dear Diary anymore? What happened to the joy of putting actual pen to paper? And why does every ordinary Jane and John think they can write well enough to burden the world with their scribblings? It’s a mystery that badly needs solving. My first entry contains my thoughts about blogging and will set your expectations. The rest will probably be stream of consciousness garbage, much like you’ll find on any other blog. Perhaps we will both come away enlightened.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Sometimes the System Goes on the Blink

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And the whole thing turns out wrong.

We received news yesterday that a dear friend has been diagnosed with Stage 4 stomach and colon cancer. It has spread to his liver as well. He is young and fit and had absolutely no symptoms whatsoever. Over the weekend he began vomiting and couldn't stop. Thinking he may have food poisoning, they trekked to the ER, expecting to get some meds and go home. Many hours later he emerged from surgery minus most of his intestines and part of his stomach. That is all we know at this point except that they are travelling to New York, where his family lives, to see a specialist. Can a person live without a stomach?

The thought makes me anxious to the point of almost vomiting myself. It's my worst nightmare come true. I have a profound fear of something like this happening to me or my husband, and now it's happened to someone we know. I couldn't sleep last night thinking about it, and I have this compulsion to call the doctor and ask her to conduct every test under the sun on Husband.

They have two young children and he is a wonderful father. I was their doula for the birth of their first child, and I can still see the look of wonder on his face as he cradled his newborn daughter. He kissed her tenderly despite the fact that she was still slippery with birth blood. He wore the expression of a man who is completely and utterly smitten. Their son was born only a couple of months ago and I know he must be over the moon.

He's a loving and devoted husband as well. The wife, K, is a great gal. We share a love of books, which is how we met. She was a co-worker of Husband's and he casually mentioned to her what a book whore I was. We began passing books back and forth through Husband without having met one another. When we did finally met, I liked her immediately. She is bubbly and quirky and fun, but a little high maintenance. J takes all her little neuroses in stride and I think that he even finds them genuinely endearing.

He's quiet. At first, I didn't know what to make of him. Was he antisocial? Unintelligent? Socially inept? Turns out, he was none of those things. He's just a guy who listens. He's an observer. He notices things. And he stakes stock. He doesn't waste time or energy on meaningless chatter, but when he does open his mouth, out come some of the most hilariously funny things you've ever heard. The first time it happened I was so taken aback by his dry comment that I think my mouth actually dropped open.

They moved from Georgia to Wisconsin last year and we haven't seen them since. I kept thinking I should call, I should email, I should write. But I didn't. Typical, right? We all do it. But now I feel really bad that I didn't try harder to get in touch. Last year, we tried to stop in and see them on our way up North at Thanksgiving, but they were in New York visiting family for the holidays. I have this awful sinking feeling that we may never see him again.

I'm angry. He's a GOOD guy. This shouldn't happen to people like him.

So there's that. And the weather is awful. It's pouring rain and the chill I so enjoyed yesterday has disappeared and it is once again steamy and swampy and disgustingly warm.

I had planned to make Lasagna, caeser salad and garlic bread for dinner. It's the first night in forever that we haven't had to be at the ballpark and I was looking forward to a nice family meal. I dragged Diminutive One to the store after his conference, which is always an exercise in frustration, only to find that Husband will have to work late tonight. And, I forgot the wine.

But dammit, I'm making Lasagne. And, I planned to eat it while enjoying "House" this evening. We haven't had much ass in chair time lately either so I consoled myself with that idea.

The cable is out.

For the second time in two weeks, we have lost service AND our entire DVR cache is deleted. Gone. Defunct. Non-existent.

I am not amused.

The cat is missing. He's gone missing before, for almost a month, which is how we ended up with three cats. The kids, Pre-Pubescent One especially, are beside themselves. I'm sorry the cat is gone, I really am. I love him too. But I am so tired of the DRAMA. Pre-Pubescent One is THE most dramatic child on the face of the planet and I am sick. to. death. of his morose speculation about the cat's whereabouts. His unrelenting doomsaying is driving me up a wall.

Two sullen kids and one cranky Mom are not a recipe for anything other than disaster with a capital D. The grumpiness has become it's own entity, growing, darkening, feeding on itself until I can hardly even open my mouth without something like "No more WIRE HANGEEEEEEEEEEERRRRSSSSS!!!!!" coming out.

I am putting my kids in bed, like NOW, and hosting the Mother of all pity parties albiet, without libations. Anyone care to join me? If so, bring booze. Lots of it.

I apologize for the extremely whiny and self-indulgent nature of this entry. I'll make it up to you when I'm done biting the heads off of live bats my children's heads off.

I need a blue sky holiday. I need Spiritual Lipstick. I need a housecall from Hugh Laurie. Stat.


  • At 10:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Everyone has days like this. I'm coming and bringing my stressed out and tired rear end. Since this is a virtual pity party, I am bringing the booze!

    Tomorrow will be a better day and I am so sorry to hear about your friend. That is tough!

  • At 8:57 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I don't know if it makes you feel any better, but House wasn't on. Well, it could have been in your neck of the woods, but Fox keeps running these commercials in my land (St. Louis, so of course baseball would trump House ~ and I am not amused either. I love the Cardinals, but Hugh Laurie is better any day, though I can't say that out loud for fear of being lynched by the mob of red shirts) that say House will return in two weeks.

    I'm very sorry about your friend. That sucks, and I'm scared of the same thing, that someone close to me will find out they've got a serious disease and that it's progressed far before showing symptoms. I hope your friend comes out healed and healthy and that he gets to see his babies grow up.

    Sign me up for the virtual pity party. I'll bring the chocolate since Flybunny is bringing the booze.

  • At 9:18 AM, Blogger OhTheJoys said…

    Virtual hugs (and booze) for you...

    So sorry to hear about your friend. We have four friends fighting cancer and it seems so wrong. Aren't we too young to have friends with cancer?! It is awful.

  • At 3:19 PM, Blogger Chicky Chicky Baby said…

    My dear I am so sorry for your friend and his family (and for you as well, he is after all your friend). I hope the specialists in NY can give him some decent news.

    I'm sorry your day went so horribly. Get a new book (I notice above you talked about just finishing one) and hunker down in your bedroom for a while. With a big plate of that lasagna you made and a glass of wine!

  • At 6:11 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I am so sorry for your friend...and for you day. But making the lasagna was the right way to go. I live every day of my life, every minute, terrified. Didn't know that did you? But I am also determined to put one foot in front of the other and go forward. Making lasagna is a great start.


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