Stop Thinking and Write
I just want you you to know that it was less about you guys, and more about me. I realize I didn't express that well.
I came off as whiney and needy, and that wasn't my intent at all.
I think every blogger hits that point where they start to wonder if maybe they've just run out of things to say. If maybe, they've reached the threshold of their ability to be interesting and entertaining, and....relevant.
So really, that post was about my dissatisfaction with myself, rather than with my readers. I always thought that if I couldn't write anything meaningful, I would rather not write at all.
And I haven't written a whole lot of anything meaningful lately.
I know that for a lot of you, blogging is just a thing you do. (and I don't mean "just" in a diminishing sense, but more like "just" in a non-defining sense) You're a person who blogs. Just like...you're a person who mows their lawn. Or a person who takes a shower.
But for me, my written words are a reflection of my identity as a writer. And if what I write is inane crap (which, at least one person seems to think it is)....that creates an identity crisis of sorts. It feels like a personal and creative failure.
Which is stupid, I suppose, considering that I am just another blogger, not a Pulitzer prize winning novelist. Talk about making a mountain out of a molehill, eh?
But it is what it is.
So...ummmm....is there a point to this post?
I guess I just wanted to let you know that it's not you, it's me.
I'm not going to hang it up because truthfully, I would miss blogging far too much. I've done that before only to come crawling back looking like a giant horse's ass.
I just need to figure out how to make Blogs Are Stupid interesting again.
There are blogs that I used to read religiously, that I truly loved because they were interesting and different. But then slowly, as they gained more readers, they became very mainstream. The dildo jokes got more plentiful and the meaningful content more infrequent. They began to rely on the easy laugh rather than post the good stuff that really takes some effort.
And it does take effort. So I get why that happens.
But I stopped reading.
And I wonder about people that I no longer see here and I wonder...have I become "that" blog?
I don't want to be "that" blog.
Shit. I hate it when I get all introspective. It rarely leads anywhere I'm truly desirous of going.
Maybe I should just stop thinking and write.