Blogs Are Stupid

Doesn't anyone believe in Dear Diary anymore? What happened to the joy of putting actual pen to paper? And why does every ordinary Jane and John think they can write well enough to burden the world with their scribblings? It’s a mystery that badly needs solving. My first entry contains my thoughts about blogging and will set your expectations. The rest will probably be stream of consciousness garbage, much like you’ll find on any other blog. Perhaps we will both come away enlightened.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

I'm Going To Miss Them

These kids...they've stolen my heart. That's a very timeworn phrase, but I really can't think of a better way to put it. And their Moms have earned my undying respect.

Tonight was the last ballgame until Spring, and we will not likely see them over the winter. They live in a different part of town, and a different school district. The Moms both work full time.

It made me sad.

So I made the most of it. I cuddled the baby and tickled her tummy and twirled her around and around, though my arms and back ached with the weight of her. When I finally stopped, she put her hands in the air, beckoning, and chirped, "MOH!" I didn't have the heart to deny her. She's been denied so much.

I asked the five year old if we could trade hair, because I've always longed for blonde hair like hers. And I have. I was an awkward young girl with brown hair and green eyes and freckles. I wanted so badly to be blonde and blue-eyed.

This child's hair is like spun gold. Cornsilk. Every analogy and metaphor you've ever heard for blonde hair applies to her floating, shimmering locks.

She replied, very somberly stroking my straight auburn hair..."But I like your hair. It's very, very smooth."

We discuss babies a lot, the Moms and I. They know I long for another baby. They know Husband is reluctant. Reluctant? No, that's not the right word. Completely and thoroughly OPPOSED, would be more like it.

They tease him about it, good naturedly. Overhearing, the five year old said,

"Why don't you adopt a baby? There are lots of babies and five year old girls who need Mommies."

And then she reached into my chest, took out my still beating heart, and wrung it to a shuddering, stuttering stop when she said...

"When I'm a grown up lady, I'm going to adopt a baby every single day. Maybe then there won't be any more babies without Mommies. Or big kids either."

Jesus.

Did I mention I'm going to miss them?

To those who've mentioned it...I did extend an offer to babysit. They've taken on three kids and I know they're still struggling to find their balance as parents. And the kids, sweet as they are, have issues resulting from the neglect they experienced. It's going to take a lot of time and effort to help them work through those things. So the Moms are tired. Happy, but tired. All parents need a break, but I think it's especially necessary for them. So..it's out there. I hope they take me up on it.

15 Comments:

  • At 11:42 PM, Blogger flutter said…

    oof.

     
  • At 9:10 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    perhaps you shouldn't let them go. Since you're fond of the moms and the kids, maybe you could offer to babysit or meet them at McDonald's/chuck e. cheese or wherever. When I used to work at a day care center, I used to offer to babysit for kids I was especially fond of. And often I did. Granted, I wasn't a stay-at-home mom at the time with a ton of home and family responsibilities, like you and I both are now, but still....... The older I get the more I realize how important it is to invest in the relationships and people who are most important to you and not to waste your time on those who treat people badly. These kids are so lucky to have found such loving parents - and to be surrounded by those who appreciate their existence and marvel in their joy. You have a great heart, and your presence in their lives would only enhance their new happy circle. Good luck. And thanks for sharing such a happy story - even if it does tug at our heartstrings.

     
  • At 9:13 AM, Blogger Amy Y said…

    Oh my ~ that 5 year old is wise beyond her years. That makes me happy and sad all at the same time.

     
  • At 9:27 AM, Blogger NatzG said…

    What anon said! Yeah! Wonderful idea. Maybe these people are more your people anyway (recalling other posts of your's).

     
  • At 9:47 AM, Blogger the only daughter said…

    Allow me a few moments to compose myself...

    Once again we are reminded of the precious gifts given & received.

    Peace with you all.

     
  • At 10:03 AM, Anonymous AA said…

    What a great idea. I know I would adopt more if I could. Barring that I think you should see if you can find a way to stay in contact. I bet those moms would love to have a break every now and then.

     
  • At 10:10 AM, Blogger (In)Sanity Gal said…

    Wow. What an amazing little girl. And how wonderful that you've had the opportunity to meet them all. It's so nice to remember that there are truly wonderful people out there.

     
  • At 10:55 AM, Blogger Magi said…

    The lunch bell just rang, which means my kids are on their way back. Now I have to quickly get these tears out of my eyes. Her last line got me.

     
  • At 11:20 AM, Blogger cndymkr / jean said…

    Don't you dare let those kids go. Run over there and get my heart back while you are there.

     
  • At 1:34 PM, Blogger Day Dreamer said…

    I hope they take you up on it, too.

    Sounds like the winter will be longer if you don't get some more time in!

     
  • At 1:35 PM, Blogger Avalon said…

    I've said it before, I'll say it again----what a beautiful little family they have created. And they are so lucky to have a friend like you.

     
  • At 8:44 PM, Blogger Baroness von Bloggenschtern said…

    I hope they take you up on your offer as well - it's a win/win/win for all.

     
  • At 8:59 PM, Blogger SUEB0B said…

    Aw what a good girl.

     
  • At 1:00 PM, Blogger crazymumma said…

    Amazing how connected we become.

     
  • At 5:42 PM, Anonymous courtney said…

    That sweet little girl just breaks my heart! What a sweetheart. My husband and I have talked about adopting a small child. Not a newborn, maybe a 1 year old or something. We're not sure yet, but there are SO many kids out there that need good homes. :(

     

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