Blogs Are Stupid

Doesn't anyone believe in Dear Diary anymore? What happened to the joy of putting actual pen to paper? And why does every ordinary Jane and John think they can write well enough to burden the world with their scribblings? It’s a mystery that badly needs solving. My first entry contains my thoughts about blogging and will set your expectations. The rest will probably be stream of consciousness garbage, much like you’ll find on any other blog. Perhaps we will both come away enlightened.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009


I got over hoping I would be the next blogger to make it big quite some time ago.

I just don't play the game right, though I did try for a time.

Actually, when I started this blog, I had no idea there was an A list of bloggers. I had no idea there were blogging celebrities. I figured it out pretty quickly though and then I thought..well hell, I can write as well or better than any of them. I could really make this into something.

You know what? Too much damn ass kissing and too much damn work.

I did pretty well for a while. I got to a point where I was consistently getting 40 plus comments on every post.

But I was spending way more time than I should have reading and commenting on blogs and joining groups I really had no interest in, just to boost my traffic.

Worst of all, I was beginning to tailor my content to the whims of my audience; going for the easy laughs and writing superficial feel good crap that really had no substance.

I know that's how authors make it big, whether they're writing novels or blogs. You have to give the people what they want. And I've found that a lot of readers want funny, superficial feel good crap.

But that's when blogging really lost it's lustre for me. I found that the joy had been sucked right out of it.

So I took a little break and came back with a new perspective. And, as I said, I'm over being dazzled by the prospect of fame and fortune. I stopped the relentless rounds of commenting and unjoined groups.

Now I blog for me. And it's good. I've found the joy again.

But that doesn't mean I don't still want to reach people. I do. Isn't that why any artist toils at his craft? To touch and inspire? Though I don't need 87 comments to get satsifaction from what I've written, sometimes, I do wonder if anybody is really listening.

The other day, I got an answer to that question when I received this email:


I am the managing editor of I just read your post about "Milk" and as hard as I've become over the years of dealing with inequality, something about your post touched me emotionally.

Thank you for this. Is there anyway I could post an excerpt from your post in the "voices from the blogosphere section of with a link back to the original of course?

I strongly feel in order to build a true "community", we need to be the LGBTA, whereas the "A" stands for allies.

Please let me know if I have permission, but either way, thank you!

James Hipps
Project Manager


I found that unbelievably cool.

You just never know who is out there reading.

And I realized that comments, though undeniably gratifying, are not a true indication of whom or how far one's words are reaching or how they might affect someone out there. Good or bad, positive or negative, our words carry weight.

This is one impact I am proud to have made and the impetus for me to stay true to myself as a person, a writer, and a blogger.

I told Mr. Hipps that I would be honored to be featured on their site. I asked if I could have permission to post his email here. But I wanted to do so to share my happiness and maybe in some small way, to inspire other writers.

My intent is not to lead villagers with pitchforks to the castle door.

So please...if your personal views conflict with the content of the site just stay away.

I would like to express my sincere thanks to James, for making me feel like I've made a difference to someone, somewhere.

It's a really cool thing.


  • At 3:00 PM, Blogger nina said…

    Do what i did and become a legend in my own mind! i am a happy little deviant blogger now...

    but of course, you know that, i've seen you at the meetings. Stop hiding in the back row!

  • At 3:39 PM, Blogger Never That Easy said…

    I'm so happy for you ~ I've never been a popular blogger (and would really have no idea what I'd have to do to get to the A List), but that doesn't mean I don't understand that sometimes what you write means so much to you that you just want someone else to 'get' it. It's really, really great that you were able to connect with someone who felt so positively about something you've written.

  • At 3:53 PM, Blogger Unknown said…

    The ratio of comments to hits isn't an indication of how many people are coming to your site and enjoy reading it. I don't get a lot of comments (Hey, I'm a blowhard and I'm guessing it's pretty hard to comment on a lot of my political rants) but my hit count is really really healthy. Like WAY healthier than I had ever hoped for.

    I am never going to be an A-lister nor do I want to be. I've found most of the A-listers to be people I'd shy away from in real life. But when someone writes to me and tells me that I've touched them in a particular way, now THAT is what the joy of blogging is about!

    Congrats! I love MILK too.

  • At 4:19 PM, Blogger Notes and letters to myself.... said…

    Outstanding my dear -- simply outstanding:)

  • At 4:57 PM, Blogger Middle Girl said…

    How so very grand. Congratulations!!

  • At 5:55 PM, Blogger Carol said…

    You ALWAYS post exactly what I need to read exactly when I need to read it! Thank you for that.

    This week seems to be filled with posts from celebrity bloggers posting from the Bloggies (or whatever those awards are called) in Austin. I have been feeling like the ugly girl with glasses on the playground, totally wishing I were popular and wondering how to achieve it.

    Thanks for reminding me about how stupid it is to be a wanna-be and thank you for giving me the nudge/confidence/support to forget about all that and JUST WRITE.

    I so needed it.

    And YES -- your "Milk" post was one of the all-time BEST posts EVER to grace the bloggosphere!! It was PERFECT.


  • At 8:48 PM, Blogger Mom101 said…

    And this is why this remains one of the most consistently thought-provoking, intelligent, and engaging blogs out there. Fuck comments. You're amazing and you touch the right people. That's A list in my book.

  • At 9:02 PM, Blogger OhTheJoys said…

    I just stay focused on telling myself, my mom, whomever, one story a day and then going to bed.

    Congrats on the well deserved recognition!

  • At 12:16 AM, Blogger flutter said…

    That is awesome, babe!

  • At 8:42 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Well done. Very well done.

    I have struggled similarly with the Blog-Fame thing. Recently, someone thanked me for a post I wrote eons ago. I inspired her to do something really cool. One person. One inspiration. Lots of lives touched.

    I smiled, I cried and then I, with great satisfaction, recognized I had done something good. With a blog.

    Congratulations. I have loved your writing for a very long time. And, to me, you are a total Rock Star.

  • At 5:01 PM, Blogger mamatulip said…

    That is AWESOME. I am so proud.

  • At 1:30 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    That is totally awesome, BA. Good'onya!

    Glad I've been following you here for quite a long time, so I can say "I knew her when" ;-) when you're way famous. >grin<

  • At 6:56 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    That is TOTALLY awesome.

    I've been reading your blog for about a year now. I'm loyal. The reason I love it is because you write about real stuff. You discuss how you feel about it. You don't write fluff. Keep it up. I think you have a dedicated readership because you write so well and pick such good topics. I'm glad you aren't catering to the masses trying to become a celebrity blogger. There are too many of those blogs and they are all the same.

  • At 6:39 PM, Blogger Ruth Dynamite said…

    You just keep doing your thing...your way. I love your posts.

  • At 9:44 PM, Blogger crazymumma said…

    well I keep coming back.....and godamn I am so darned famous.

  • At 5:12 PM, Blogger Amy Y said…

    That is very cool! Congrats!

    I started writing (albeit very infrequently) for me again and I'm down to about 7 comments a post. Blech.

    But it serves its intended purpose.

    And though I get behind, I will always love your blog :)

  • At 10:29 PM, Blogger Sarah said…

    that is absolutely fantastic.

  • At 12:16 AM, Blogger Kiy said…

    Very awesome. Seriously. And you never know, do you, who you've touched.

    Speaking of which. I wasn't going to tell you I did this because, well, I don't know why. But, I mentioned you on my blog a couple of days ago.

    See, you just never know who you will touch. :)

    Cheers, Kiy

  • At 10:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    i totally think the allies ought to be included.


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